“Who is the mum? Who is the dad?”: Same-sex couples’ motivations for and experiences of parenthood

This research is an interpretative phenomenological analysis of same-sex couples’ decision-making process and experience when starting a family. Four same-sex couples with children participated in virtual semi-structured interviews. There is limited sociological research offering in-depth analysis of the relationship between sexual minority identities and the motivations, desires, and experiences of parenthood. This research reveals an array of complexities in the timing of parenthood. Participants also discuss the importance of financial and relationship stability before starting a family and the challenges and uncertainties throughout their unique adoption and IVF journeys. Moreover, participants reported the ongoing impact of the institutions of, and assumptions underpinning, heteronormativity on their experiences as a family, as well as the coping mechanisms they employed to counteract the consequences of heteronormativity.